3 Personalities of Your Monkey Mind
HI happy holiday weekend ladies! I just got back from walking up and down the steps at Red Rocks Amphitheater here just outside of Denver Colorado … its such BEAUTIFUL place and really steep.
If you’ve never been to a concert at red rocks I highly advise you put that on your bucket list…. Its a natural acoustic amphitheater, and all the music greats perform there … and during the day exercise junkies go and test their physical metal doing all kinds of exercise on those steep stairs … from elite athletes to old people like me who just want to keep mobile and strong!
Speaking of testing your metal, I want to talk about 3 different ways we put our own metal to the test … and I am talking internal talk mental…. internal talk that leads to self sabotaging behaviors.
The three I want to talk about are
1: inner critic
2: Inner skeptic
3: self saboteur.
So, in a nutshell, even tho the OUTCOMES of listening to these 3 inner voices always limits your personal power somehow, the INTENTION BEHIND each of them is to protect you from harm.
For example: the inner critic …. the inner critic is always alert, always on, and notices everything that isn’t “Perfect”.
You’ll know its your inner critic when you hear yourself saying you could of done more, should of done it better, I left this out, or … it wasn’t “perfect” somehow.
Most of us, especially women, especially highly achieving INTELLIGENT women kinda wear the inner critic as a badge of honor … to let everyone know, ya, I'm good, what I've done is good, but … it should-a, could-a been better … right …. but this is not a victimless crime …
We do it so we don't feel like we are bragging, or too big for our shoes, right, because society has conditioned women, for the most part, to play down our greatness, withhold our full power, so we don't make others around us feel bad, so we fit in more.
THIS IS NOT A VICTIMLESS CRIME, because whenever you say, "It should of been better", right, it implies that whatever you are talking about wasn’t quite good enough o pass your muster ….. you saw the flaws… there was something more you could of done. …. right?
And when it isn’t good enough in your eyes, you automatically signal to yourself and to the universe, and to anyone listening, that your efforts don’t deserve rewards ……. ouch!
Talk about an opportunity for your inner saboteur to “punish you” by withholding rewards ... meaning the things your want most … like launching a new product or service, or getting paid well, or getting positive recognition for a job well done …. when your inner critic looks for flaws in something you have put your heart in soul into it will always find something that could be better … because we live in an imperfect world and there will ALWAYS be things to improve upon .
Can you see why an overactive inner critic is set up to limits your power?
Now, lets investigate the INTENTION BEHIND YOUR INNER CRITIC.
The inner critic is a part of you that forms in early childhood to make sure you either: get praise and recognition, or avoid criticism or punishment.
It is a form of self love that was set up to protect you from the pain of not being recognized, or the pain of criticism or punishment of some type.
AND there is a very close distinction between high levels of accomplishment , high standards of quality for yourself and perfection …. by being bullet proof “perfect”.
That is why so many coaches and motivational people always say … launch your products or services at 80 -90% perfect, There are always upgrades, new releases, new versions… .right?
Lets talk next about one of its sisters … very closely related, but not the same. That would be your Inner Skeptic.
So, your inner skeptic is the part of you that wants to protect you from being tricked some how. It raises its opinions whenever a new idea shows up that seems outrageous.
Like when a used car salesman says the car your test driving has less than 100k miles on it, but the carpets, the seats and the foot pedals are worn thin …. and your inner skeptic notices that and thinks, I don’t believe this salesman … the car looks like it has 200k miles on it, right?
When it comes to a business focus to embrace like a doubled or tripled income goal, your inner skeptic will say things to you like; "I don’t know how to do that", or "I’ll have to work too long", or, "I’ve never done that before…. I don’t believe this is possible for me" …..
Can you see with skeptical beliefs like that, how you would not #1 but THAT car, and #2 how you probably would brush off doubling or tripling your income unless you found a way to overcome those kinds of skeptical conclusions?
Lets talk about your Inner Saboteur …. this part of you can be VERY tenacious, depending upon the amount of personal embarrassment you carry around … unconsciously of course … or push down and affirm over if shame ever bubbles up, right?
Your inner saboteur is the part of you that knows your scariest, deepest darkest truths… It knows every mistake you’ve ever made, every flaw … superficial and very deep flaws…. basically everything you want to hide from the world, because you’d be unbearably embarrassed if people knew these deep dark secrets about yourself.
This is the part of you that says things a bit differently than the inner critic or inner skeptic… it says things like "you’re stupid", "your worthless", "you’re a looser", "you’re an idiot." … Its either angry or dismissive … that depends upon your personal programmings….
This is also the part of you that carries out punishment . It's entire mission is to keep you the same and NOT let you go to the next level with yourself, your relaltionships, with your business with your money and success…. as directed by your inner critic and skeptic.
Kinda dark … I know, but remember, that is what I am all about… finding the dark, outdated hidden progaming that robs you of power, and bring it to the light to be let go of and healed…..
So, this part of you that is keeping track of all your mistakes …. it IS trying to keep you from repeating them … and so when this part of you notices something that looks like danger ….. it triggers self sabotaging behaviors to prevent you from getting hurt AGAIN as you effort to go to the next level with … anything,,,, your body, relationships, your business … any next level goal .
It will say to you: "You will never get rid of me", "Its not safe to say you are good enough", "I won’t let you do anything that says you are". "I will fill you with shame and fear and use the evidence of every mistake, and pain you ever felt against you." "You an NOT moving", "You are not good enough".
And then it triggers the most frustrating behavior patterns ever … like unreasonable procrastination, avoidance, spinning in your head, feelings of panic and overwhelm … like OMG… I should clean my office RIGHT NOW, instead of market myself, or I should overeat or watch marathon TV instead of finishing the program or videos that you know will make the impact with your customers you really want for them. …
These are the inner most parts of you that hold you back. And the good news is, there is definitely a systematic way to overcome this triad of internal obstacles ….
Its not healthy to completely “remove” or “clear away” these parts of you, because they are survival mechanisms to keep you safe, right.
Remember they were installed in childhood, and you are an adult now and so much wiser, more personally powerful than when you a tiny child. This programming isoutdated and conflict with adult dreams, desires and goals.
I have transformational tapping processes that absolutely will calm, and tame these “survival” self love instincts that get out of hand whenever you step up into next level personal power ….
If you want to find out what your inner critic, skeptic and inner saboteur have to say about you moving to the next level with money and success, I invite you to a FREE clarity call with me where I’ll take you though a diagnostic process to uncover your exact blocks, and offer you the BEST way for YOU to update, clear, heal them and move forward with greater ease and personal power /enlightenment towards your goals or not.
HERE IS A LINK TO SIGN UP TO WORK WITH ME … I work with women serious about shifting so, please be serious about wanting to identify and clear your blocks when you sign up for this FREE session!
Sending love and light to you, your family and your biz.